steffielee

So my friends, I know it has been a while but a lot has been going on.  I was so excited to lose all of that weight with all of your help.  The only thing now is that I am 12 weeks pregnant.  So after losing all that weight i’m probably going to gain it all back.  I am so happy to become a new mother, but also a little bumed for getting so far only to get back tracked.  But I know its worth it and I know its possible for me to lose the weight again!! love you guys.  Hope you are all ready for the holidays!

Oh goodness I have been bad the last couple of days.  I just feel so bloated.. Had chips and chocolate today………………….

TODAY IS A GOOD DAY.  I MET MY VERY LONG AND REDICULOUS MINI GOAL..  THIS TIME I HAVE SET A MORE REALISTIC MINI GOAL AND I CAN’T WAIT TO REACH THAT.  I KNOW ITS GOING TO BE MORE DIFFICULT NOW BECAUSE IT TOOK ME WHAT SEEMED LIKE FOREVER TO LOSE THOSE LAST FEW POUNDS ON MY MINI GOAL.  I GUESS ITS TIME TO STEP IT UP A NOTCH OR TWO.  I NEED MOTIVATION FOR EXERSIZE.  I HAVE LOST MOST OF MY WEIGHT ON CHANGING MY EATING HABITS ALONE.

I am so happy that I only have one more pound to go before I reach my mini goal of 215.  It has seemed like it took forever but its finally almost here!!  I can’t believe I set such a high mini goal to begin with.  When i first started I didn’t know you should make your mini goals ten to fifteen pounds.. but oh well.  I’m not giving up this time.  I’m moving to south carolina and need some kind of beach body I feel comfortable in.. and who knows maybe next year I will feel confident enough to wear a bikini.  I bet its possible!!

YOU KNOW HOW SOME PEOPLE HAVE THOSE ANIMATED WEIGHTLOSS PROGRESS PICTURES ON THEIR PROFILE???  DOES ANYONE KNOW HOW I CAN MAKE ONE???  I REALLY WANT TO SEE WHAT MINE WOULD LOOK LIKE… SO IF ANYONE KNOWS PLEASE GET BACK TO ME.

10 more pounds to go until I reach my mini goal.  Its so exciting and yet it still seems a ways away.  But i’m making progress and trying not to let temptations rule me.. My mom made mini pizzas for dinner tonight and I didn’t feel like cooking so I cut the pizza in half and cut up some cucumbers instead of eating the whole thing.

I have a membership at my local gym and I just started going again.  A couple of days ago I over heard some of the guys I went to high school with comment on the way I was working  out.  I have never been a very fit person and working out is not my favorite thing to do.  So when I’m in the gym and i’m making an effort at changing my life it hurts to hear some of the comments I heard.  One comment was made about the incline on the elliptical not being high enough and that I shouldn’t be sweating as much as I was because the god damn thing was almost touching the ground.

Another thing, Someone showed me an easier way to do pushups, which is on the ball.  They were saying shit about that too.  Snickering and taunting me.  Man I felt like I was in high school all over again.  I just wanted to crawl in my little corner again.  So I got discouraged and left.

I have not been back to the gym since that happened and I would be a liar if I said that wasn’t the reason why.  I’m just so angry and in a way I’m letting them win by not going.  I just don’t want to relive my high school years all over again.  They were my nightmare years.  I don’t know why I let it bother me so much.  I don’t know why I let them hurt me again.

I wish I could take what they said and use it as fuel to my fire.  But i’m afraid if I go back and hear them talking shit again It will put me right back in the mood i’m in now.

SO THIS PAST MONTH HASN’T REALLY BEEN EASY.  I HAVE BEEN UP, DOWN, AND ALL AROUND AND I’M READY TO GET BACK INTO IT.  I HAVEN’T CANCELED MY GYM MEMBERSHIP LIKE I THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO, EVEN THOUGH I HAVEN’T BEEN THERE IN A WHILE.   I AM READY TO START AGAIN.  TO CONTINUE IN THE PATH I WAS LEADING BEFORE.

I HAVE KIND OF LOST FOCUS OF MY GOALS.  I’VE LET DISTRACTIONS STEER ME AWAY.  ITS SO HARD.  I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE EASY.. BUT IT ISN’T.  HOPEFULLY I WILL BE ABLE TO GET BACK ON TRACK….

SORRY I HAVEN’T BEEN VERY POSITIVE LATELY.  I’VE JUST BEEN GOING THROUGH SOME THINGS.  I’LL BE BACK TO NORMAL IN NO TIME..